The heading pulled you in. “Encounter with Cardinal Otunga, the prelate who was buried twice.”
What stands out of that heading? First, “encounter”. It suggests riveting revelations. Second, “buried twice”. You’ll be like, what? Why?
But The Standard’s March 12 story by Kamau Ngotho, all 27 paragraphs of it, turned out to be hot air.
In fact, it died in the intro.
“Recently, I was in Kisii County to take my son to Form One. But do I say? He was admitted to Nyambaria High, the school that had the best national KCSE mean score last year.”
“But do I say?” That’s a line for cheap barbs in bar talk. This was amateur hour. That quip has absolutely no place in stellar writing. A keen subeditor would have thrown it out.
An intro is one of the most carefully thought out sentences in journalism. It anchors a story. It gives the reader reason to read on. What in that sentence does either?
Anyway, the story told us that this year is the 50th anniversary of the late Maurice Michael Otunga being made a cardinal of the Catholic Church.
Ok, hence the story. We got that. Now what about that “encounter”?
The writer set out to detail his visit in 1998 to Cardinal Otunga’s last residence, a Nyumba ya Wazee in Huruma, Nairobi, five years before the prelate died.
Everything about this visit was set up as a big deal. The reporter sought permission from Waumini House in Nairobi, the administrative headquarters of the Catholic Church in Kenya.
He was told he needed to write to the Vatican through the office of the Papal Nuncio, the Pope’s representative in Kenya. Ha!
The reporter decided to ignore all protocol and just show up at Huruma, where he met an “Italian tigress” for a nun – she ran the house.
This set up tells you that this interview must be big. And the reader can’t wait to “hear” it.
But how did it turn out?
When the reporter eventually got to sit down with the man of God – whom the “Italian tigress” had to wake up from his afternoon siesta – alas, nothing happened. Nothing.
Take a look. The writer wrote: “Since there is no space to reproduce verbatim all he said in the interview, I will cherry-pick excerpts from it.”
Ok, nobody wants to read an hour-long transcript. So the cherry-pick must be really juicy, right?
Wait for it. Two quotes from the cardinal.
One: why did the revered cardinal choose to retire “with the aged at the charity home against wishes of the church”? Answer: “I love my church. But there is nothing wrong living with these old people.”
Two: what did the cardinal think about Kenya? Answer: “There is no love among us… There is nothing greater than true love?”
And that was it.
Really? Is this what you were told to seek permission from Rome to speak about? Is this why you woke up the cardinal?
And what was that about him being buried twice? Not a word.
How did the reporter tie it up at the end?
“I am sure God the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit dwells with and comforts the departed cardinal where his soul is. Pray we shall all join him when the day comes. Amen.”
C’mon man!
The reader learned nothing. Nothing.
